What You will Find on This Site

Blog Posts about Recovery from Compulsive Spending and Debting

(Scroll down for most recent posts) This website contains HUNDREDS of articles to help you work a program of recovery around compulsive spending and debting. Topics range from setting up a spending plan to working the steps to dealing with relationships in recovery … and much more! Pick a category from the Sidebar, type a topic in the “Search the Site” box, or just scroll down to read the most recent posts. The articles on this website were written by Susan B., a recovering compulsive spender and debtor. You can read about her recovery journey here.


Recovery Books

The Getting Out from Going Under Daily Reader for Compulsive Debtors and Spenders

Pageflex Persona [document: PRS0000038_00070]

The Five Year Recovery Journal


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4 thoughts on “What You will Find on This Site

  1. Hi Susan.
    Love love love your daily reader. I’m an AA member and have been in recovery for 5 years. However my “ism” pops up all over the place and compulsive spending coupled with compulsive internet use are two of its manifestations. Today’s reading was 100% what I needed to hear. I enjoy the podcast too. I relate a lot to your obsession with arts and crafts. I have a garage full of materials and abandoned projects. Hoarding is another of my issues – I wonder if you touch on that as we compulsive shoppers/spenders accumulate endlessly. I find it very hard to “let go” of things even after years in recovery.
    Thank you so much for your service.

    I

    • Hi Caroline,
      Thank you for your wonderful letter! You made my day! It’s funny you mention hoarding as I was just talking to a friend who is suffering with this. Boy, I can really relate as well. Just finished recording this week’s podcast, but this is a great topic for next week. 🙂 So thank you.

      I’d love to hear more of your thoughts on accumulating and the pain of letting stuff go. How does having all that stuff in the garage make you feel?

      You can send me an email through the Contact page at ICantStopSpending.com if you’d prefer. Or continue replying here.

      Again, I really appreciate your taking the time to write.

      Susan B.

  2. Thanks for the invitation to communicate about it. I shared in a meeting the other day that my garage was a museum displaying Caroline’s broken dreams…

    Boxes and boxes of fabric and trims from when I was studying textile art and fashion, massage table and equipment I bought when I thought I would work in that career, commercial cooking equipment, general arts and crafts supplies, books and manuals from the vast number of courses I have done, boxes of sentimental stuff, my late father’s furniture etc. etc.

    It feels like the garage is a manifestation of my psyche… “I am not enough as I am and have to do or be something else…something more”. However, often that career or project hasn’t worked out and I can’t let it go for some reason.

    Sometimes it feels just too overwhelming to contemplate sorting it all out. I go in there and look around and basically turn around in circles. I don’t know where to start. I don’t know where to put things or how to deal with them. I don’t know what is important and what is no longer important. I have a bit of a meltdown and walk out.

    However, yesterday I had a little shift (perhaps due to sharing at the meeting and sharing with you). I boxed up all my yarn and knitting needles and contacted a friend who is housebound and asked if she was interested. She was delighted and I was able to move at least that. I think that got I inspired and I filled to bags for the charity shop with some fabrics (I still have about four massive containers left).

    Even while doing this I was plagued with letting go of the possibility of completing the project in the near future. I felt a bit of panic about missing out and had to console myself with the idea that I was helping someone else and that is part of my recovery.

    I’m a single mother and I work full time. My son is an elite athlete so a lot of my time is spent driving him to sporting events. The balance of my time is spent at AA meetings! I don’t have any time to spend on art and craft anymore. I think that’s another reason why I feel it is so difficult to let go – not accepting that my life is what it is right now.

    I often buy clothes too, when I feel I’ve been working too hard or missing out. This behaviour became unmanageable when I began doing a lot of internet shopping this year.My target was a particular Australian label which is quite coveted here. Their limited edition garments gave me a feeling of being special and being in an exclusive club. They did look great and cheered me up but I crossed the line into obsession. I kept shopping and wanting more. I actually had to borrow $1000 from my mortgage to pay my credit card. That’s when I found your blog and podcast.
    I apologise for being all over the place but I’m still in confusion about it all…. I know from my experiences in recovery that I’m basically just trying to change the way I feel with stuff and filling the “God shaped hole” inside.

    Thanks again for asking me to share – I’m quite humbled.

  3. OMG I am sitting here stunned because I can relate to so much that you are sharing! Wow. Especially the part about the careers not achieved and the supplies sitting there. So here are a few things that you might find helpful:

    1. Did you ever take a look at the Marie Kondo book: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying up?
    https://www.amazon.com/Life-Changing-Magic-Tidying-Decluttering-Organizing/dp/1607747308/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1470683580&sr=8-1&keywords=konmari

    *******2. This article was amazing about decluttering for people like us:
    http://www.rootsimple.com/2015/02/de-cluttering-for-diyers-homesteaders-artists-preppers-etc/

    3. This episode of the podcast has a lot about that and another great resource:
    http://icantstopspending.com/012/

    Thank you so much for sharing this with me. I hope you won’t mind if I quote some of your comments when I do the podcast on this topic (probably not this week though).

    *****

    The thing is, recovery from compulsive spending doesn’t mean that you stop having the desire. It means that you have ways to deal with it besides acting on it. And, as you know, with any addiction, once you give in, the craving sets in and we are powerless to stop. So it has to start with not taking that first drink, which in this case is the first obsessive spending or debting.

    And the best tool to stop you in your tracks is the spending plan IF you are willing to live by it. But that is where HP must come into the picture to help you and where the support of other recovering addicts can give you comfort and strength.

    By the way, if you could write a quick review on Amazon about the book, I would really appreciate it. 🙂

    And, I am in multiple programs and am reeling right now from trying to work them all. I understand what you mean about that acceptance part. I am going through that now. I can’t do everything, and I, too, really miss creative work, but there is not much time for that. In fact, I was just writing a list of EVERYTHING in my life and trying to prioritize. EVERYTHING seems a top priority. Ugh

    Giving away the knitting seems a very loving gift. They say if you aren’t using it, it’s as good as gone anyway.

    Thank you again. You don’t seem confused at all to me. Keep me posted on your progress sorting things out.

    Susan

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