The definition of equanimity (from Google): “Mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, esp. in a difficult situation.”
What a great word! Now, as far as I can tell, this word is not mentioned in the Big Book, the 12&12, or in DA literature. Yet, I associate it with recovery.
These are the qualities I strive for as a person in recovery from compulsive debting and spending. Notice that there is nothing in the definition of equanimity that specifically speaks to dealing with money, yet without it, I am nothing but a dry drunk.
As part of my recovery, I do not spend money I don’t have. By doing that, I will never again get into debt. But without equanimity, I can compulsively spend abstinently, and for me, I want peace of mind when spending. Otherwise, I am just a spending binge waiting to happen.
That is why working all the steps is so vital. I see the purpose of the steps to help me develop equanimity, not just around money, but in my relations with others and in how I walk in the world.
Equanimity is how I express who my Higher Power wants me to be. When I have mental calm in a difficult situation, I can better connect with that Higher Power to make a decision. When I have evenness of temper in a challenging interaction, I am channeling the unconditional love of my Higher Power.
For today, equanimity is an achievable goal. Even if I don’t reach it in all situations, striving for it can help me stay in recovery.